Post surgery

September 12th ....  it is a beautiful day - I am sitting here writing my blog - getting waited on hand and foot by my girlfriend Maureen - just having a lovely chicken sandwich and a glass of milk (no wine on the menu yet)!

Surgery is over, the breast is gone and I am hoping the cancer has gone with it!  Obviously waiting for pathology report from the surgery, but I feel a sense of relief.

September 9th - surgery day!

I arrived at the hospital at 6:30 on Friday morning - early morning check in!  We had been up at 4 am - Brandon stayed over at the house to drive George and I downtown.  I was relieved the surgery was at Mount Sinai because they keep mastectomy patients in overnight afterwards.  The only hospital to do so, it is normally day surgery everywhere else.  I was taken to the 'wardrobe department' where I changed into the beautiful blue gowns - given a very stylish hat and matching socks and was allowed to wait in the day surgery waiting room with the family - Nicole had met us at the hospital.  After all the joking around about the new outfit we determined that the women looked better in these outfits than the men - skirts are definitely better on women!

I was called to have the first procedure - a die injection into the sentinal nodes under the arm - this tracks where the nodes are and makes it easy for the Dr to find.   It stung like a bee sting.  They injected die into two areas and then I was about a 20 minute in a cat scan type machine - I guess photographing the area and checking to make sure the dye was working.  The pain diminished quite quickly and I was allowed to go back to the waiting room.

Surgery was delayed about 1 hour - I did not seem nervous - it is funny - all during the time between diagnosis and surgery I was not nervous.  I felt it was inevitable for me to go through this process.  That it had been coming for a long time and now it was here.  Even walking down to the OR, the nurse holding my arm was pulling me back and telling me to take it easy - weird!

I had already spoken to the anaesthatist and he explained what he was going to do.  He was very nice and although he was just the resident, I felt in safe hands.  I got myself on to the table in the OR - everyone was milling around getting things ready - it was a hive of activity.  Dr Cil came to see me - she seemed perky and confident and I spoke to her about my concerns that perhaps I should have thought about having both breasts removed - she explained there was absolutely no reason for concern in the other breast and that was something we would talk about at a later date.

They wasted no time trying to find a vein to put in the IV - my veins was hiding - even on the good arm.  They explained that because of having nothing to eat or drink the veins were collapsing due to dehydration - I didn't know that that occurred.  Anyway obviously they found one because that was the last thing I remembered and when I woke up the IV  was in the other arm.

I came to in the recovery room - it was like a dream - watching a movie - people milling around - it was like an out of body experience - I wasnt quite with it - spoke to a beautiful girl named Karen - she was taking good care of me.  All I wanted was my morning coffee!!

The Dr came in and said everything went very well - she seemed really happy and that is when she told me she didn't have to take the lymphnodes from my arm - she took the two to test and they were clear and so didn't have to do anything more.  She had a big smile on her face and I was so relieved.  Still groggy I closed my eyes for a few seconds and next time I opened them there was my husband and son at my bedside - both with silly grins on their faces - I said 'you look sooo good'!  They came with me to my room on the 11th floor - it was like checking into a 5 star hotel (sort of) - it was a large room with wall to wall windows and there was the CN Tower right in front of me.

It was over - reality crept in - I realized there was a deep cavity in my chest where my breast had been and which now was the new me!  I wasn't angry or sad - again just the realization that things would never be the same for me - but if this is what it took for the cancer to be gone, then so be it.

It was a long night - family had gone home and I watched the clock dozing in and out of sleep - at some point I thought the clock had stopped - I seemed to sleep for an hour, but when I woke up it was one minute later.  My roommate was very nice - we had a nice little chat and seemed to have a mutual respect for one another.  The nurses were kind and pleased with my progress - peeing by oneself is a huge step apparently!  No after effects from the anaesthetic, no nausea - so I was good.

Morning came and all I could think about was breakfast - a cup of coffee and something tasty.  Well I waited and waited and it turns out it wasn't a 5 star place after all!  They forgot me at breakfast!!  The nurse had to get me a tray later and it was awful - rubbery bagel - piece of cheese and tea.  The morning nurse was great - we hit it off right away and became fast friends.  Nicole came in around 9 am with a great cup of coffee and I was now happy!  There was no rush for me to leave - I had to wait for the home care people to come in and so we just enjoyed our chat.  Nicole has been amazing through all of this and I couldn't have asked for better care over the weekend.

All of my family have been amazing and without them I don't know how I would have gotten through it all.  The prayers and good wishes from all of my friends and family have been very powerful for me and it was this power that got me through even the toughest moments.  Thanks to everyone.

So on to the next phase.....

Nurse coming in half an hour to check on the dressing etc.

I am eating canteloupe, chocolate, having tea and coffee and feeling very spoiled.